What Fairy tale are you Choosing?
Fairy tales. Ahh there's just something about fairy tales hey? They always seem so magical. I wonder why so many of us, me included, dream that our lives will turn out in the happily ever after that childhood fairy tales often do? I wonder if it's because it is exactly what we want? It's the very best that we hope we will get in life? For ourselves. For our friends. For our children. For all our loved ones.
We want them to be happy and to experience the happiest stories and events that life can offer and bring. We dream and hope that nothing bad will ever happen to them or ever hurt them in any way. That maybe they won’t have to go through what so many do. To get hurt; emotionally and physically. To experience loss. Fear. Anger. Sadness. We don’t ever want that to happen, we just want the good, the happy, the pleasurable moments.
Maybe that's why many parents read fairy tales to their children as bedtime stories. Just before they’re about to drift asleep. Children can have those moments, those thoughts ringing in their ears and minds bringing dreams to life. Soothing them with what is to come. Their parents voices bring the stories to life and create pieces of them inside of us. They relish in the fact that they end in happiness. That good overcomes the evil. That right over comes wrong. The stories tell words of wisdom; spelling out advice and lessons that are unbeknownst to us.
Even if we're not kids, fairy tale stories gives us hope. That a beautiful story awaits us in the future. We’ll get swept up by our very own Prince Charming.
They give us light. A light in the darkening skies. One that shines so bright it’s like nothing will dim it and it will never misguide anyone.
They give us love. That warm feeling that glows in our body. Tingling all the way through, setting it alight with overpowering joy.
Everyone needs this. Needs these feelings. Child or adult. Everyone needs to feel loved and like they’re needed. Like they are useful to the world in some way. They contribute and help, even if in a tiny way. And it’s more than a want. It’s a need.
A need to feel these things. To feel love. And hope. Joy. Belonging. Needed. Wanted. Cherished. Important.
We need to feel to get us through the tough times that will always lie ahead of us, even if we never were aware of them, if they were lurking in the shadows.
We need our lives to end in the way just as fairy tales do. So that we can be satisfied. So that we can smile and sigh with peace knowing that everything is perfectly in place.
And maybe that’s why we try so hard to believe in that and to keep the story-telling’s going. To try to keep them alight. Keep that fire burning for as long as we possibly can. Because even if we may now know that life isn't really as simple as a fairy tale may write...we can give ourselves hope...we can give others hope. Just as our parents once did for us. Probably for that very same reason.
Here's my thought for you though, stemming from fairy tales. I want to ask you...what fairy tale are you choosing?
I wonder if we were to drop OUR desire of our own fairy tale - one that is full of our own biases and judgements, whether we like it or not and can see it or not - and actually were to embrace the fairy tale that God has for us?
What if we were to focus solely on our Heavenly Father, continue to learn who He is, and thus who He created us to be, and walk out in the fairy tale He has written for us?
Now that sounds so much easier said than done I know, my goodness I can so easily get caught up in fairy tales that are these beautiful movies or books or other people's lives. But, that can ultimately come to destroy me. Destroy my thought patterns, my outlook on myself, my self-worth, my view on God, my view on others, jealousy and comparison can come into play.
So, here are a few things that help me focus on His fairy tale He has for me, rather than what I can dream up or one that I can fit myself into based on a previous written story or somebody else's:
Spend time with Him daily - by doing this I learn more about who He is and I ultimately learn more about myself through that (e.g., reading the bible, listening to worship music, praying).
Focus on what He wants me to do in the present - not what I may have done in the past or what I want to be doing or what I could be doing in the future - but focusing on outworking what He has placed in my hands right now in this present time and where he has my feet planted.
Confide in a trusted friend, family member, leader, partner, etc., - talk things through with them, tell them if you're struggling, ask them to keep you accountable to focusing on you and not getting caught up in others' around you.
Every time I catch myself starting to stress or worry about what I'm doing, my future, if it's enough, if I'm going to get beautiful fulfilling moments - I remind myself of what God has promised me, and us - through the Bible and through the quiet whispers from Him in my quiet time (e.g., He promises to strengthen us [Ephesians 3:14-16], He promises to take care of all our needs [Philippians 4:19], He promises to answer all our prayers [Matthew 7:7], He promises to work everything out for our good [Romans 8:28]). I remind myself that God made us uniquely and so His plan for me is different from everyone else's but just as breathtakingly beautiful.
Ephesians 2:10 - "For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago."
Psalm 139:14 - "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."
I remind myself that it's all in His timing, His timing is perfect and He cannot be rushed.
Now, they're just a few things that I find helpful, they may work for you, they may not, you may already be doing them, you may be doing other things...whatever the case...I hope it gives you something to ponder and maybe even something to try if you struggle with this at times.
I encourage you to not choose the fairy tale you have created for yourself. Not to choose someone else's fairy tale. But, to instead, every day, choose the fairy tale that God has created just for you. That by far is the most beautiful one there is.